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Advent Calendar Day 21: The Vesper Crave

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by Chelsea

UPDATE: CONGRATS TO TIFFANY, OUR WINNER!

Welcome to the 21st day of our 2016 Holiday Advent Calendar, where we’re giving away 30 prizes in 24 days, including many of our favorite toys! Every day, we’ll be posting a new contest and linking to it from the Holiday Advent Calendar main page, where you can also find more details and tips for how to win.

Today we’ve got the Vesper Crave 24 Karat Gold:

24kt Gold-Plated Vesper

This striking gold necklace hides a naughty secret: it’s actually a powerful vibrator. With an intuitive one-button control and only a few essential settings (low, medium, high, and pulsing), the Vesper is elegant in its design as well as its exterior. Splash-proof and USB rechargeable, this vibrator is luxurious in every way.

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Want to win? Here’s how: We want you to #SexUpAChristmasCarol i.e., replace a holiday classic with some NSFW lyrics. Tomorrow at 11:30am, we’ll pick our favorite and the person who submitted it will win!

U.S. residents only.

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10 Comments

  • Miss Mara

    “Santa Daddy, just slip a dildo under the tree for me. Been an awful bad babygirl, Santa Daddy, and hurry down my chimney tonight.”

    ReplyDecember 21, 2016 at 11:44 am

  • John D

    Here cums Santa Claus
    Hera cums Santa Claus
    Right down Santa Claus lane
    He’s got a bag that’s filled with sex toys
    For boys and girls again
    Hear those Ben Wa balls jingle jangle
    Oh what a beautiful sight
    So jump in bed, and spread your thighs
    ‘Cause Santa Claus cums tonight

    ReplyDecember 21, 2016 at 11:50 am

  • Kate

    Trump’s nuts roasting on an open fire!

    Also,

    Then I saw mommy tickle Santa Claus,
    Underneath his balls so snowy white,
    Oh what a laugh it would have been,
    If daddy had only joined in,
    Mommy pegging Santa Claus last night!

    ReplyDecember 21, 2016 at 12:06 pm

  • Bandit

    Slave bells ring,
    are you listening?
    Balls bound tight,
    pre cum glistening.
    He’s happy to night,
    the ropes are quite tight.
    Fetish in a winter wonderland

    Early on,
    she squeezed his knackers
    As she pulled on them like crackers.
    The howl that he made
    when his buttocks where splayed/
    fetish in a winter wonderland.

    In the dungeon we can have some fun there
    Tying people up and people down.
    We can use the violet wand and wax gear.
    see if his screams can be heard across the town!

    Later on by the fire
    we can roast their desire.
    Cherry red tits and bottoms and bits
    fetish in a winter wonderland
    lots of fetish in a winter wonderland!!!!!!

    ReplyDecember 21, 2016 at 12:39 pm

  • Lindsey

    Silent Night
    Hole-y Night
    Nipple clamps
    Ballgag tight
    Pound yon virgin
    On latex sheet
    Holy pussy so tender and sweet
    Rut in heavenly peace
    Rut in heavenly peace

    ReplyDecember 21, 2016 at 1:29 pm

  • Lucy

    Randy the Ridged-Head Dildo
    You know Leo and Nexus and Outlaw and Tex’s ins,
    Mistress and Mustang and Maverick, all Vixens…
    But do you recall
    The most famous dildo of all?
    Randy the ridged-head dildo
    Had a very shiny finish,
    And if you ever saw it
    You would never call it diminished.
    All of the sex shop patrons
    Said that him they couldn’t tame;
    They never let poor Randy
    Have a chance in their membranes.
    Then one lustful sexmas eve
    A partner came after saying
    Randy with your girth so wide,
    “Won’t you glide into my orifice tonight?”
    Then how the size queens loved him,
    As they shouted out, amazed,
    “Randy the ridged-head dildo,
    I’ll go down on you always!”

    ReplyDecember 21, 2016 at 2:28 pm

  • George

    Oh, ten-inch-dong
    Oh, ten-inch-dong,
    How lovely is your pounding.

    With every thrust,
    You make me scream.
    With every thrust,
    You make me cream.

    Oh, ten-inch-dong,
    Oh ten-inch-dong,
    How lovely you have stretched me.

    ReplyDecember 21, 2016 at 3:16 pm

  • Maria L.

    Joy to the world! The Lord has come.
    Let Earth get her clit
    All wet and throbbing
    Give her some room
    And heaven and nature sing
    And heaven and nature sing
    Because he’s not sleeping until she fucking comes.

    Joy to the world, the clitoris reigns
    Let women and their clits explode
    While fields and floods
    Rocks, hills and plains
    Repeat the sounding joy
    Repeat the sounding joy
    Repeat, repeat, the sounding joy

    ReplyDecember 21, 2016 at 7:32 pm

  • Tiffany

    *GASP*, another shiny~! Want <3

    It's beginning to be a frisky Christmas
    Ev'rywhere lube flows
    Have a hump in the kinky den, pussy glistening once again
    With handy's, canes, and Sybians a-go~

    We're beginning to have some fun this Christmas~
    Toys in the Pleasure Chest store,
    And the prettiest sight to see is Holly tied up ready
    On your own wooden floor~

    A pair of latex bound boobs and edged cock that can't shoot
    Is the wish of Bella and Ben
    Sex dolls for a fuck and cock rings that will lock
    Is the hope of Jimmy and Jan
    And Mom and Dad can hardly wait
    for all of the relatives to leave and for the kids to fall asleep so they can finally use their sex toys for once finally Jesus Christ that felt like forever why did Aunt Lucy talk so long about her cats oh my god

    We're beginning to sex it up on Christmas~
    Ev'rywhere you go
    Make some moans through the ball gag, "woah!", use a dildo as well
    The buzzing kind that fits the other hole!

    We're beginning to love a lot on Christmas~
    Soon slave bells will start
    And the thing that will make you sing are the orders that you fling
    Right within your heart~!

    ReplyDecember 21, 2016 at 8:21 pm

  • Rogeno

    Last Christmas, You gave me a hard-on
    The very next day, you blew it away
    Some light hair pulling and heavy fondling
    I’ll put it some place special

    Last Christmas, You gave me a hard-on
    The very next day, you blew it away
    Some light hair pulling and heavy fondling
    I’ll put it some place special

    Once bitten (on the tip) and twice in the eye
    I’ll stand 3 feet away and cum in your eye
    Tell me baby who’s your daddy
    Well it’s been a good year and I’m feeling horny

    I wrapped my shaft in ribbon and sent it
    With a note that said “Blow me” I meant it
    I am getting a really bad case of blue balls
    But if you kissed it and sucked it I’d cum all over again

    Last Christmas, You gave me a hard-on
    The very next day, you blew it away
    Some light hair-pulling and heavy fondling
    I’ll put it some place special

    ReplyDecember 22, 2016 at 5:07 am

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