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Hookup Roundup

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by thepleasurechest

In case you haven’t yet had your daily dose of heteronormative moral panic, here’s the New York Times’ take on “college hookup culture”…

She Can Play That Game, Too

Until recently, those who studied the rise of hookup culture had generally assumed that it was driven by men, and that women were reluctant participants, more interested in romance than in casual sexual encounters. But there is an increasing realization that young women are propelling it, too.

[...]In this context, some women, like A., seized the opportunity to have sex without relationships, preferring “hookup buddies” (regular sexual partners with little emotional commitment) to boyfriends. Others longed for boyfriends and deeper attachment. Some women described a dangerous edge to the hookup culture, of sexual assaults and degrading encounters enabled by drinking and distinguished by a lack of emotional connection.

(New York Times)

 …and some responses that just might make the sky stop falling:

The Hookup Elites

So what we are seeing on college campuses is the same dynamic we see outside of colleges.  People with privilege—based on race, class, ability, attractiveness, sexual orientation, and, yes, gender—get to set the terms for everyone else. Their ideologies dominate our discourses, their particular set of values gets to appear universal, and everyone is subject to their behavioral norms. Students feel that a hookup culture dominates their colleges not because it is actually widely embraced, but because the people with the most power to shape campus culture like it that way.

(Slate)

It’s Time for an End to Women’s Stories

It’s not hard to see why these stories succeed: They are about very young women having lots of sex with multiple partners. They’re a lot like porn, except that instead of an orgasm you get a vague sense of free-floating anxiety.

(Salon)

What We Write About When We Write About Hookups

We need to change the way we talk about casual sex. It needs to be more inclusive, both of people and of narratives. Writing the exact same story again isn’t just boring; it’s bad journalism.

(Brute Reason)

Hookup Culture Story Old News

 It may in fact be a phenomena that doesn’t have to be explained or accounted for or culturally deconstructed or politically analyzed. It may be much murkier—a moment, a phase, a situation, an evening, a mood—in an irreducibly individual woman’s life.

(Slate)

Casual Sex Meets Cognitive Dissonance

So, if the game is rigged in favor of inculcating second-guessing and insecurity (which can be further stoked by consumer culture cures purporting to put the control back in your hands, natch), what are your options in the face of damned if you do, damned if you don’t? You can refuse to play. You can refuse to let your personal become their political. You can take your sexual decision making out of their system. You can get all ahistorical on their asses and decide to prioritize the context of your own life and circumstance over figuring out whether or not you’re in line with the sexual attitude du jour (cloudy with a chance of promiscuity!). It isn’t easy, but neither is attempting to live by a system that rewrites the female sexual code of conduct at will and only deigns to tell you about it after you’ve transgressed.

(BitchMedia)

What else is missing from the conversation? Add your own thoughts on hookup coverage in the comments below. 

 

 

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