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How to buzz together in the bedroom (or somewhere else way more scandalous, if you want)

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by thepleasurechest

Using a vibrator with your partner for the first time can be intimidating, that’s for sure, but building that kind of intimacy is totally rewarding, and the reward can be  not only more orgasms, but also a sense of fun and openness to please one another sexually. There are all kinds of vibes that are especially great to use with a partner, whether they’re designed in a way that makes them physically accommodating during intercourse or made specifically to offer stimulation to both partners.

Here are some common questions and concerns that may come up when you’re looking to add a buzz to the bedroom:

  • What will my partner think of me if I grab desperately under my bed for my Hitachi Magic Wand 20 minutes into a vigorous round of thrusting? We’re not gonna lie, this could  startle  your lover, partly because they might think you’re about to attack them with a baseball bat, but mostly because the best time to talk about sex toys is generally before you start having sex. A surprising number of people are unfamiliar with the idea of using vibrators during partner sex, and also with the fact that most female bodies do need some form of clitoral vibration to orgasm. Well before the deed begins, it helps to sit your partner down and let them in on this information, along with some personal encouragement and motivation like “I love how you fuck me and I want to come extra hard for you” or “Later, I can show you how good this feels on your balls while I suck you off.” After all, even the most secure among us hate to feel left out of the action!
  • Speaking of vibrators the size of sports equipment, are there any vibes you might recommend for couples just starting out with toys or that are specifically designed for partner use? We happen to know plenty of couples who use and really enjoy the strongest, loudest, most unwieldy vibes around, but we do have recommendations for those just starting out, and there are more and more vibes being made that are designed specifically for partner sex. In general, you’re probably going to want something that’s on the quiet side and fits nicely between two bodies, like Jimmyjane’s Little Chroma. Vibrating cock rings, like the Vibratex Duet are very popular with couples because they provide hands-free stimulation to one partner’s clit or perineum while trapping blood in the penis of the wearer for an erection that can be harder and stronger. We-Vibe has created a revolutionary dual-stimulation vibrator that can actually be worn during sex! One end of the totally waterproof, rechargeable silicone vibe hugs the clit while the other goes inside the vagina, resting on the g-spot and allowing enough room for a partner to penetrate and feel the vibrations at the same time!
  • This is all so new and overwhelming, it makes me want to lie down… and try it! Any tips and tricks? For some folks, the ultimate foreplay is the element of surprise and/or control. Those types tend to enjoy vibrating panties or other wearable remote control vibes. One partner wears a tiny vibrator tucked between the labia or under the balls while the other controls the vibrations from afar. A finger vibe (or vibrating cock ring) fits around fingers without too much bulk or fuss and makes for a great reach-around during doggie style sex. Vibrating cock rings worn around a penis or dildo offer the most clit stimulation in the “cowgirl” position. It’s like turning your partner into a giant rabbit vibe with hands (don’t tell them that though)! We love the Laya Spot by Fun Factory because it’s quiet, splash proof, and its ergonomic shape feels wonderful in the hand and on the clit. You can also use it to cup his balls during a blow-job for extra stimulation and many thanks.
  • So that’s what they mean by “sharing is caring”… Wait! You may have learned in kindergarten that sharing your toys is always the polite thing to do, but with adult toys there are a few important guidelines. Rule number one is never, ever use a toy in the butt then use it in or around the vagina unless it has a fresh condom on or is a non-porous toy that has been properly cleaned. Non-porous toys are those made of silicone, non-porous hard plastic, metal, or glass. They are safe to share with a condom or after having been properly cleaned. On the other hand, a porous toy (made from several materials, the most popular being porous hard plastic, elastomer, vinyl, jelly rubber, and cyberskin) should never be used anally without a condom unless it is to remain an anal toy for the rest of its days. Sexual partners who are STI tested and fluid bonded may share porous toys, but we still recommend condom use in the case of jelly rubber and cyberskin due to high porosity and potentially harmful plastic softeners.

1 Comment

  • CC

    Will you guys ever carry Vida?? Here’s a youtube link if you haven’t heard of it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WzZ5RPfybQg

    They’re apparently “green” cuz they are rechargeable…Thank God, cuz I hate batteries!!

    ReplyFebruary 18, 2010 at 3:56 pm

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