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Dec 31 2010

The Maneater. Turn On or Buzz Off?

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by thepleasurechest

For last week’s holiday edition of Turn On or Buzz Off, we asked you about the Chocolate Santa with Buttplug, a curious confection dreamed up by conceptual artist Paul McCarthy. The votes are in and over 60% of respondents had a sweet tooth for jolly Old St. Nick and the oddly familiar object clutched in his hand.  Unfortunately, this kinky treat hit the market over three years ago, and can likely only be found in the chocolate-stained clutches of your finer art collectors. So, sadly Chocolate Santa with Buttplug will not be coming to a Pleasure Chest near you.

This week’s contestant is most definitely not a gallery piece, and you probably wouldn’t want to try eating it (though it definitely wants to eat you.) Introducing The Maneater, a terrifying, bright green beast from outer space, who wants to um, suck on your cock. How does he do this? Here’s what the manufacturer, Big Teaze Toys has to say:

The insatiable MANEATERS toys for boys have a voracious appetite and will stop at nothing to bring YOU pleasure. With just a simple squeeze to its bellybutton, you are engulfed with one of three groan-inducing speeds. How’s the clean-up, you ask?  Let’s just say that everything about the MANEATERS is quick and easy…

Oh yeah, he’s also waterproof, phthalate-free and runs off of 2 AA batteries. The Maneater reminds us of the juvenile style of the Bzzzbuddies, (which most of you loved) from a few weeks ago. It could easily be mistaken for a kids’ toy. But, mostly we’re worried about looking ridiculous while using this thing to get off. Will your boyfriend or girlfriend be jealous of this one-eyed monster? Or will you simply look silly with this creature gnawing on your junk? What do you think? The Maneater. Turn on or Buzz Off?

Dec 31 2010

Have a happy nonporous new year!

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by thepleasurechest

Here’s our very own Sex Nerd Sandra with some tips on the benefits of nonporous sex toys.

If you’re making a New Year’s resolution to go nonporous in 2011, we’d like to remind you that we’ve got silicone dildos, as well as the glass, wood and steel varieties. Oh, and we’ve got the Aneros, Njoy plug and Smart Balls that Sandra recommended.

Make a pledge to treat your bits to the finest materials in 2011. Let’s have a toast to nonporous sex toys!  And here’s to your pleasure and your health in the coming year!

Dec 27 2010

So Many Nice People, Just One Club Vibe

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by thepleasurechest

In last week’s Club Vibe giveaway, we asked you to tell us something nice about someone special on your gift list. There were so many great answers that it was tough to pick just one. We were especially touched, however, by this from Shannon in California:

I have started a new relationship with a woman who got back from Iraq last year. She’s had a few surgeries as a result of her tour. Consequently, sex is not in the shape 2 lesbians “normally” have sex. We have had to be creative with positions. At the young age of 51, I thought I knew all there was about my having an orgasm. Thankfully, due to these changes, I have discovered some interesting ways to be pleasured. And, for these amazing changes, I would love to thank her. I hope I thank her enough everytime I see her, but just in case, a little help of thanking her from your friends never hurts! Even if we don’t win, I really want to thank you Pleasure Chest for all you do. I’ve been coming to your store since 1979. You’ve made me a happy girl for a long time now! I hope you all have an amazing holiday!

Thank you for that, Shannon. You win the Club Vibe for your partner!

Eric in New York won the runner-up prize of a $20 gift card for his future wife Constance who just discovered she’s expecting their first baby!

“She is a beautiful, happy, smiling person and her usual glow is near blinding these days.”

Finally, Aida in California won the Jimmyjane Afterglow Massage Candle for her thoughtful partner, of whom she said:

“I really thought good men didn’t exist anymore until I met my sweetheart.”

Congratulations to all three of our winners, and to everyone who wrote us to testify about the wonderful people in their lives. We hope you all had a very happy holiday!

Dec 23 2010

Turn On or Buzz Off? Chocolate Santa with Buttplug

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by thepleasurechest

In our last Turn on or Buzz Off poll we asked for your opinion on the MMA Throwdown Bed, a combination mixed martial arts fighting ring and bed set. The result was a split decision. Half of you were ready to rumble, while the rest of the respondents either cried uncle, or puzzled over how to fit this monstrosity into their bedrooms. We’re calling it a draw. Sorry, there will be no MMA beds coming to a Pleasure Chest near you! But if you end up buying one, please invite us over for a match.

In honor of the holidays, this week’s Turn On or Buzz Off has a seasonal flavor. We’ve told you before about conceptual artist Paul McCarthy’s controversial “Buttplug Gnome” statue, which has Dutch politicians in a tizzy. The “gnome” (AKA Santa)  is seen holding a bell in his left hand, and what is alleged to be a Christmas tree in his right. As many complained, the “tree” looks an awful lot like a buttplug.

A few years ago, the Buttplug Gnome became so famous that McCarthy and his gallery went into the candy business, making 20,000 chocolate replicas of the infamous statue. Channeling Willy Wonka, McCarthy describes this detour down the Hershey highway as follows:

Chocolate Santa is 10″ and is made with 14 oz. of Guittard semi-sweet dark chocolate and comes with a podium. Chocolate Santa is $100 plus Shipping and Handling.

It’s unclear from this site if you can still purchase this questionable confection. We’re guessing they’ve become collectible art pieces! Whether they’re still for sale or have all gone stale, we want to know what you think. The Chocolate Santa with Buttplug: Turn On or Buzz Off?

Dec 21 2010

Free Ornaments & Holiday Beverages at all of our stores!

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by thepleasurechest

If you’re still looking for the perfect decoration, gag gift or Secret Santa present, check out our funny and punny holiday ornaments.

Choose among 8 different sexy sentiments:

  • God Rest Ye Merry Leathermen
  • Season’s Beatings
  • Tits the Season
  • Happy Nude Year
  • Kiss Me Under the Cameltoe
  • Cock! The Breakfast of Champions
  • Ass & Ye Shall Receive
  • Not So Silent Night

We’re so proud of these, we’ve decided to give them away. Come to any of our stores between now and the close of business on Christmas Eve, and we’ll give you one, absolutely free. You don’t even need to buy anything!

While you’re here, enjoy complimentary holiday beverages, between 6pm and 9pm!

Dec 20 2010

Win a naughty Club Vibe for someone special. Isn’t that nice?

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by thepleasurechest

Last week’s Club Vibe giveaway was so popular, we’re going to do it again!

The Club Vibe is a high tech toy that buzzes along with your iPod, MP3 player and even the sound of your partner’s voice. We think it’s a great gift. And since the holidays are about giving,  here’s your chance to win the Club Vibe for someone special in your life. Here’s how:

  • Simply post a comment on this blog entry and tell us about the person on your gift list who most deserves the Club Vibe.
  • Then, tell us something nice about that person! Yes, nice. Be generous. Be specific. Singe their praises.
  • You don’t have to use your real name (or theirs), but please make sure to use a valid email address.

On Thursday morning at 10AM PST we’ll award the Club Vibe to our favorite entry!

In addition, we’ll also award a fig-leaf scented Jimmyjane Afterglow Massage Candle to the sexiest answer, and a $20 gift card to the funniest answer. That’s three ways to win.

So, hop onto our lap, and tell us why your special someone deserves the Club Vibe. And please don’t tug on the beard.

Dec 17 2010

Your Club Vibe Pleasure Playlist

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by thepleasurechest

On Monday, we introduced you to the Club Vibe, a high tech toy that vibes along with your favorite tunes. We asked you to tell us which song you’d most like to get off to. This morning, we shuffled the playlist. And the winner is…

“Shawna”  from Chicago! Her favorite song was Lil’ Wayne’s “Lollipop.”

We also asked you to tell us why you wanted a particular song on your Club Vibe playlist. There were many creative answers. Some of you get off on the lyrical content of the song. Others geeked out on the rhythmic patterns, bass sounds and tonal properties. But our favorite response, hands-down, for most creative answer was…

“E,” also from Chicago, who wrote the following:

Though I would dearly like to say “The Chosen Priest and Apostle of Infinite Space” by noise band Bull of Heaven – because it is the single longest recorded song (over 2 months long), and because I am both a hierophiliac and desperately interested in prolonged forced orgasms. Unfortunately, I fear that it would either result in burning a hole in my clit or causing some very deeply disturbing interactions with my coworkers. Plus, I mean, after the first 3 hours or so, I’m bound to develop a rather intense case of laryngitis and potential arrest. So! I’m going to go with track 1 from the solaris soundtrack (Cliff Martinez) because nothing says climax like a moody, transporting film score in space. And it begins gradually, slowly crescendos, then intensifies for a full two and a half minutes of relentless teasing. It’s like I’m begging for permission to come already.

I think we can all agree that “E” deserves the $20 gift card!  Congratulations to both of our winners. And while we couldn’t find every song you all suggested (that 2 month long noise song would probably crash our computer), we did put together this playlist of the contest entries. So, plug in your headphones or Club Vibe and get off. This is your Pleasure Playlist.

Dec 16 2010

It is better to give AND receive

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by thepleasurechest

The holidays are here! If you’re as weary of Christmas songs as we are, then you’re probably ready to hit the egg nog pretty hard this weekend. But don’t forget that this is also the season for giving and receiving. The best gifts are the ones that you’ll get the most pleasure out of giving (and enjoying later!)

So, if there’s a loved one on your list, consider stuffing their stocking with something from The Pleasure Chest. Here are some ideas, both naughty and nice…

The We Vibe

$99.95

Dubbed “the couples vibrator,” this ingenious device is the only vibe designed to be worn during intercourse. Its unique design gives clitoral and G-Spot stimulation, while providing pleasure for both partners. It’s rechargeable, made of body-safe silicone, and looks pretty stealthy on the bedside table. If you’re buying for a partner, the We Vibe is a great example of giving a gift, that you secretly want for yourself! If buying for friends, the We Vibe makes the perfect present for a couple.

Jimmy Jane Afterglow Massage Candle

$28

These sublimely aromatic candles melt into luxurious massage oil. Unlike wax, the plant-based oils melt at a low temperature, making them safe to drizzle or brush onto your partner’s skin. When the oils cool, they harden again, giving you up to 32 hours of use from a single candle. All of the scents are great, but bourbon is the house favorite here.

Curious Couples Kit

$39.95

This box of joy is ideal for couples. Containing coupons for naughty and nice sex “IOUs,” edible body powder, Pleasure Chest lube, and a vibrating cock ring, this kinky kit will help people come together during the holidays.


Spareparts Joque Harness

$99.95

I saw Mommy pegging Santa Claus! Here’s another gift that both you and your partner can both enjoy. The Spareparts Joque is one of the most versatile harnesses ever made. It’s fully adjustable, fitting bodies of all shapes and sizes, without the fuss of buckles and snaps.  Sturdy, breathable, machine washable, the Joque is fitted with a stretchy, built-in O-ring that can accommodate most dildos.

Sliquid Organics Natural Intimate Lubricant

$14.95 (4 oz.)

Give the gift of lube, with our favorite organic lubricant. Sliquid’s water-based formula is hypoallergenic, glycerin-free and blended with certified organic botanical extracts that help heal and support the body. It’s pretty much the perfect size for stuffing a stocking. Also, try their warming formula!


Jimmyjane Iconic Ring

$36

Your dad already has enough ties. Get him a cockring! Jimmyjane’s Iconic Ring is not just any cockring. It’s a mini marvel of design and function. It operates in both continuous and touch-sensitive modes, with pleasuring nubs to satisfy both partners. Made of stretchy and strong, water-resistant elastomer, the Iconic Ring has a replaceable motor and comes with a one year limited warranty.  Ring in the holidays!

Dec 15 2010

Nina Needs Your Help

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by thepleasurechest

Our friend Nina Hartley needs your help. The sex educator and porn legend will be undergoing an expensive surgery, and facing a mountain of medical bills. A mutual friend posted this message to the charitable website GiveForward.com:

If you’re reading this you’re likely already a friend, or fan, of Nina’s. Thanks for taking the time to be here. She’s always made an effort to connect on the personal level with all she meets, and it’s from that personal level that I write this. If you’ve ever had a moment’s fun with any of her work there’s something real, concrete and life saving you can do for her and it won’t take much.

She is seeking funds to cover her recovery from surgery, tentatively scheduled for late January/early February 2011. Recovery will take 2-4 weeks, depending on how it goes.

As some of you already know she has fibroid tumors in her uterus. They’re genetic and are not cancer, nor will they turn into cancer, so that’s a blessing right there. However they are unsightly and are starting to cause other, negative side effects. After dealing with them for nearly twenty years the time has come for a permanent solution. She thought that nearing menopause would cause them to shrink but they show no signs of doing so. So, surgery is the next step. She’s lucky enough to have medical insurance to cover the cost of the operation. What she needs is money to cover her expenses during recovery. In twenty-six years she’s never needed help more. As an example of how easy it could be, if each of her Twitter followers donated just five dollars that would cover everything.

Hartley is one of the most visible and passionate members of the sex positive community– a feminist, pornographer, sex educator and hero. Please consider donating to Hartley’s recovery, and sharing this message with others. Thank you!


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