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Feb 10 2011

Pangao Breast Enhancer. Turn On or Buzz Off?

2

by thepleasurechest

We’ve got the dirt on last month’s poll about the lint roller with a vibrator hidden inside. 62% of you would gladly take L’Intimate out for a spin, while just 12% want it to stay hidden. We’re also proud to report that 27% of you don’t bother to hide your sex toys at all. Now, that’s what we call “true grit.” Stick with us, because L’Intimate might be rolling into a store near you soon.

This week’s contestant on Turn On or Buzz Off is a vibrating bra. Or as its Chinese manufacturer Pangao calls it, a “Breast Enhancer.” Why would you want such a product? Allow the very enlightened feminists at Pangao’s marketing department to explain:

A well-developed and sexy cleavage is a symbol of a female’s charm. The female breasts are not only meant for feeding babies; they are an important part of a woman’s body. Every woman dreams of having beautiful and sexy breasts as this is perceived as being attractive.

Pangao Breast Enhancer is the best gift for every woman. By using it often, it can prevent and cure breast diseases and enhance the shape of one’s cleavage.

But how does this miracle product work? Read on:

PANGAO Breast Enhancer stimulates the female breast, accelerates blood circulation and activates cell renewal and hormone secretion through physical massage by the vibration balls found within the enhancer. Thus, the female breast is obviously enlarged and will look more rounded, sexy and youthful

PANGAO Breast Enhancer effectively pushes up the breast, dredges breast glands, eliminates blood stasis and prevents breast diseases and breast from flaccid. It also moves fat from problem areas to give a well-shaped figure. If used often, it can prevent insomnia, increase immunity to diseases and assist in better internal secretion.

Wow, it’s too bad the name “Wonder Bra” was already taken! And if you don’t believe the copywriters from Pangao, just check out the celebrity endorsements. Here’s a clip of Ellen DeGeneres and Jennifer Aniston dredging their breast glands on national television.

As sex positive folks who like breasts in all shapes and sizes, we’re not sure that the vibrating bra is something we can, uh, support. Our cups runneth over with companies preying on women’s insecurities to make a quick buck. Still, the boobs running Pangao may have another agenda in mind. Vibrators of yore were often sold for their “health” properties, so perhaps this vibrating bra is really a stealth sex toy. Would the extra jiggle make you giggle? Does the vibrating bra make you titter? Or just angry and bitter?

Feb 06 2011

Five Scenarios for a Sexy Valentine’s Day

1

by thepleasurechest

Stuck on how to spend Valentine’s Day with your sweetie? Tired of the same old dinner and a movie routine? Here are some suggestions for changing it up while getting down. And we’ve got the gear to make each of these five fantasies come true.

Play Doctor

“I’m not a doctor, but I play one in the bedroom!”

If you’ve got the patience (and the patient) for a little medical roleplay, grab your partner and begin the examination. Let’s Play Doctor is a fun and easy game for kickstarting your fantasies. It comes with a spinner and cards prescribing 45 different roleplaying scenarios. For added realism (and safer sex), slip on some sexy, black nitrile gloves. If you want to take a closer look, consider using a Graves Vaginal Speculum, which can be used for more intimate exams. If your patient requires treatment (and we know they will), you may want to try a traditional healing method with this fire cupping set. Or, if your patient is suffering from a bite (especially one on their nipple), this snakebite kit could come in handy. Whatever ails them, make sure to finish with a kiss to make it all better.

Skip Dessert

After your Valentine’s Day dinner, satisfy your sweet tooth by saving dessert for the bedroom. If there’s any time of the year to rock a candy g-string, it’s Valentine’s Day. And dudes, there’s a matching set just for you. If you’re feeling artsy or want to wax poetic, you can write sweet nothings all over your partner’s body in rich, dark chocolate with this Shunga Chocolate Body Paint. It’s almost as fun to “erase” as it is to apply. For something more sensual and less sticky, try the Kama Sutra Honey Dust, an edible powder, made of pure honey, which comes in a satin pouch, complete with a feather applicator. Finally, when you’re ready to get down to business, try some Sliquid Swirl lube. The sugar-free, vegan, water-based formula comes in six delicious flavors, from Pink Lemonade to Cherry Vanilla.

Surrender Yourself

This Valentine’s Day, why not hand over the keys to your heart (and other parts) to your lover, partner, mistress or master? Whether you’re giving yourself for an evening, or a lifetime, a collar is a simple, elegant and sexy expression of submission. We love this Tear Drop Locking Collar, made with English Bridle leather and a “teardrop shaped” stainless steel ring. For an even more intimate surrender, lock up your cock, with the CB6000, a long-term male chastity device, made of medical grade plastic. It even comes with plastic locks for those tricky airport metal detectors! If you want to submit, but your partner is still new to BDSM, we recommend When Someone You Love is Kinky, a handbook for helping your lover understand the mysteries of the kinkster heart. Finally, you can’t go wrong with our Silk Entangle Ties, elegant ribbons for wrapping up the greatest gift of all– yourself!

Discover a New Position

Whether on the floor, or up against a door, Valentine’s Day is a great occasion to try some new positions. To get your imaginative juices flowing, check out the Position of the Day book. Packed and illustrated with 366 sexual positions (one for every day of the year, plus one extra for leap year), this handy manual has enough ideas to keep you getting busy until Valentine’s Day, 2012. For help negotiating all those new positions, try investing in a Liberator Wedge. This sturdy foam support wedge provides the lift and leverage to put you and your partner in all kinds of compromising positions. Its sexy microfiber cover is smooth against the skin and machine-washable. But, if you hate post-sex cleanup, perhaps you should move the action to the shower. The Sex in the Shower product line uses an ingenious array of suction cup handles and footrests for a safer, less slippery way to play with wet and wild sex. Finally, if you think you’ve tried it all, hoist ‘em high and try the Door Jam Sex Sling from Sportsheets. Made of comfy, padded nylon, this sling can be thrown over any sturdy door for spontaneous action, whenever the mood arises. No handyman needed. Unless that’s a part of your fantasy, too. (And who are we to judge?)

Play in Public

We’re not looking to get you arrested, but there are discrete ways to play in public, while enjoying the thrill of being discovered. After Valentine’s Day dinner, why not hit a nightclub, bar, or darkened movie theater and smuggle some toys in your pants? For discrete fun, nothing beats the Club Vibe. This discreet bullet vibe responds to ambient sound, which means it can be equally fun on a dance floor or in a crowded restaurant. If you want an even more interactive experience, try the BNaughty Unleashed Remote Control Bullet. A handy remote control with LED display allows you or your lover to choose up to 10 powerful pulsation settings. Sit across from your partner at the dinner table and turn it on, while she tries to conceal her excitement from the people around her. Or, if you want a toy that will give dual clitoral and G-Spot stimulation, try out the ever popular We Vibe 2. As a bonus, this toy can be worn during intercourse, so if you decide to risk public sex, in a backseat or a back alley, she’ll have a headstart on the fun. No matter what the gender of your Valentine, you can never go wrong with a butt toy. For a discrete anal thrill, try warming up an Njoy Pure Plug before setting out to the paint the town red. Made of silky-smooth stainless steel, these popular plugs fit snugly inside your butthole, giving an extra nudge to the prostate. This is especially fun during long walks on the beach or bouncy cab rides through the city. No matter how big a scene you decide to make, remember to tip generously, and make a fast getaway.





Feb 03 2011

The Kinky States of America Map

1

by thepleasurechest

We’re honestly a little puzzled about how to read the map above, but the overall project is pretty damned fascinating. Here’s an explanation from artist R. Luke Dubois:

I joined twenty-one dating sites in order to make my own census of the United States in 2010. These are my findings: a road atlas of the United States, with the names of cities, towns, and neighborhoods replaced with the words people use to describe themselves and those they want to be with.

These maps contain 20,262 unique words, based on the analysis of online dating profiles from 19,095,414 single Americans.

Each word appears in the place it’s used more frequently than anywhere else in the country.

Enjoy.

Some initial findings?

New York City’s most frequently used online dating word, for example, is ‘Now’—confirming just about every Type A stereotype of our town’s inhabitants. (In Chicago, incidentally, it’s ‘Always’. And in L.A., ‘Acting.’)

Having some familiarity with the online dating scene in Los Angeles, we downloaded a map of the words associated with our neck of the woods, and the results are fascinating.

We really wish the artist had identified the actual zip codes and neighborhoods these words correspond to, because frankly, we’re not too familiar with maps of LA. But, if we’re reading this map correctly, Westsiders used words like “enchanting,” “lingerie,” “beingness” and “sexual” but also “misanthropic,” “misogynistic,” and “phony.” Equally jarring, in South LA, is the prominence of the words “suicidal” and “inmate,” sandwiched between “waif” to the west and “neurosis” to the east. We’re guessing “chutzpah” designates the Fairfax District, while “augmentation” and “screenwriter”  identify that amorphous area known as Hollywood. And, of course, the word “gaffer” is unique to LA!

If you want to see which words define the singles scene in your neighborhood, you can view and download maps for your city or state here.


Jan 28 2011

The winners of our Tantus Toy Giveaway

1

by thepleasurechest

We’ve finally picked our winners in this week’s Tantus giveaway. With over 50 entries, the lucky, randomly-selected winner was Chad from New York. Chad appears to be a fan of our Turn On or Buzz Off feature as his reference-laden paen to the Tantus Echo demonstrates:

Defo the Echo! Last year we’ve saw a variety of monster sex toys. Zombie dildo (bleck) “Uh..your condom fell off. Wait..What do you mean you weren’t wearing a condom?” *shudders* Sparkly vamp dildo (rolls eyes), The Ghatan (I prefer to eat my calamari, not sit on it) & a mean, green, vibrating monster that munches your meat (say that 10 times fast). Only fitting that we’d kick off 2011 w the cock of an angel (Pharzuph, you’ve really done it now), cause I’m guessing it feels like heaven! ;)

Well, Chad, you’ll have to let us know just how heavenly it is. Congratulations and thanks for being a loyal reader of this here blog!

Chad wasn’t the only fan of the Echo. The vast majority of our readers– 25 of you– also asked for the Echo. The Charmer was a distant second.

Our favorite entry came in the form of a poem, courtesy of Michael from Bellflower, CA. Here’s his ode to the Tantus Buzz:

I’m interested in the Buzz
I’m interested becuzz
I’m new at this thing anal
And I’m not being banal.
I need some stretching in case
I get lucky.
The Pleasure Chest offer
Seems perfectly ducky.
If I have unearned luck
I will think of you whenever I —-
Your name will ring out with orgiastic pleasure
With clenching releasing in waves without measure.
So send me your Buzz as soon as you can.
I’m getting so tired of using my hand.

Speaking of “hands,” let’s give Michael a big hand for this creative entry. We’ll be sending him  a $20 Pleasure Chest gift card to reward his literary efforts. Thanks to all who participated, and please keep an eye on this blog for more cool contests.

Jan 28 2011

L’Intimate. Turn On or Buzz Off?

2

by thepleasurechest

Voter turnout was very low in last week’s poll on the Obama Condom. With 100% of precincts reporting, we can now confirm that the Obama Condom will not be taking an oath of orifice.

Even though our fragile democracy has vetoed the Presidential prophylactic, we note that the British monarchy has its own version. Check out “Crown Jewels” brand condoms created to honor the upcoming nuptials of Prince Williams. Our suggested slogan: “For when you want to get royally fucked!”

This week’s contestant on Turn On or Buzz Off is classier than our usual fare. It’s a product designed for those discrete souls who want to keep their sex toys hidden from prying eyes. Say bonjour to L’Intimate, (a play on the words “lint” and “intimate”), a functional lint roller, with a secret compartment in the handle for storing a vibrator. It’s basically a stashcan for your vibe!

Or, in the words of its manufacturer, Miss Chivus:

L’Intimate is a dual-functioning product that elevates the level of class and discretion for women looking to maintain pleasure in their personal lives. Our goal is to provide a functional compromise between natural sexuality and sophistication.

There’s even a helpful diagram showing you how to open the secret compartment and remove your vibrator (which is included). Miss Chivus promises that L’Intimate is “the first in a soon to be revolutionary line of ‘disguised’ adult products.” There’s definitely a demand for covert sex toys. There are already sex toys disguised as lipstick, a sponge, a USB thumb drive and even a bicycle grip.

For those with nosy houseguests (the kind who open drawers and look under beds), L’Intimate might be a dream come true. As a fringe benefit, you might get a special thrill when an unsuspecting visitor runs the roller along their coat or evening gown. Or, on the other hand, will you have neurotic visions of the guest unlocking the secret compartment and discovering your naughty secret?

We have irrational fears of our own. Around our house, the lint roller is the primary weapon in the war against cat hair– the natural enemy of sticky sex toys. Do we really want our vibrator riding shotgun inside a lint magnet?

Let us know what you think. L’Intimate. Turn On or Buzz Off?

Jan 27 2011

Scenes from a workshop

1

by thepleasurechest

Our Sex Specialist Jenae

We had a friendly crowd for the Strap On, Get Off workshop last night in Chicago. The seats were filled with folks yearning to learn the ins and outs of dildo harnesses, strap-on sex and more. Here are a few photos of last night’s lesson.

The La Palma Glove

Visual aids

Wanna come?

Check out the schedule for our upcoming workshops here. They’re always free, and lots of fun.

Jan 27 2011

Meet Carlos!

1

by thepleasurechest

Carlos the greeter

If you’re in New York, be sure to stop by our store today, and meet our new temporary seasonal worker. His name is Carlos. His turn-ons are watersports and corn cob pipes. His turn-offs include snowballing and hot wax.

Carlos melts our heart

Carlos is our new store greeter. Mention “Carlos the Snowman” at the register in our NY store, and get 10% off your purchase, today only. (And yes, he’s getting a nose job with his first paycheck.)

Jan 24 2011

Have a Tantus on Us!

54

by thepleasurechest

As many sex toy connoisseurs know, Tantus makes some of the best dildos in the world. Each toy is handmade in the USA from body-safe, 100% ultra-premium platinum silicone. They can be boiled, bleached, even thrown in your dishwasher. Best of all, Tantus products come in all different shapes, sizes and colors.

This week, we’re giving away a Tantus dildo to one lucky reader of this blog. And, to make things more interesting, we’re going to let you choose which one you want. Here are the 6 toys to choose from.

Buzz

Charmer

Echo

Pro Touch

Ripple

Silk

Simply post a comment on our blog (right here!) telling us which Tantus toy tickles your fancy. Then tell us why. If there is a particular color or size you like best, testify! On Friday, January 28th at Noon PST, we’ll pick one entry at random.You don’t need to use your real name, but please include a valid email address so that we can contact you.

We’ll also award a $20 Pleasure Chest gift card to the best, funniest, or most original answer. So, be creative!

Finally, if you follow us on Twitter (LA, NY, Chicago), retweet the contest announcement and we’ll enter you twice! Be sure to post a link to the RT in your contest entry on the blog, to be counted!

Good luck!


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