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Sep 09 2013

Top 10 Worst Sex Scenes

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by thepleasurechest

worst sex scenes

“Slither slither slither slither went the tongue…”

We love good erotica, but we won’t deny that there’s a unique pleasure in reading really, really bad smut. If you understand the joy of wondering, “Why would he use that metaphor? Why would anyone ever use that metaphor?” then you’ll get a kick out of The Telegraph’s compilation of the top ten worst sex scenes in modern literature.

Part of what makes this fun is that the authors whose work is being singled out are widely-published and even celebrated: the quote above is from Tom Wolfe. We feel okay poking fun at Tom Wolfe in a way that we wouldn’t feel if we were laughing at a stranger’s slash fan fiction.

Of course, bad sex – like all sex – is subjective. Still, “like a lepidopterist mounting a tough-skinned insect with a too blunt pin he screwed himself into her” is, at the very least, memorable.

Sep 06 2013

Special Set List Edition! Performance Anxiety – September 10th

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by thepleasurechest

performance anxiety flyerSept 10th

Join us on Tuesday, September 10th at 8pm for another evening of Performance Anxiety, the twice-monthly comedy night at our West Hollywood store.

For this special Set List: Stand-Up Without A Net show, the comedians will each be given four topics from which they must improvise new jokes on the spot.

For just $7, you get free beer, 15% off your purchases and an evening with some of the best comics working today.

The show will feature appearances by

Presented by Troy Conrad!

For more info about Set List, go to www.setlistshow.com.

The show is first come, first served and you are encouraged to buy tickets in advance to guarantee a seat.

Please enjoy Kira Soltanovich in a previous Set List show.

Sep 02 2013

Look at Porn While You Look for Furniture

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by thepleasurechest

IKEA

Summer is coming to an end, which means that you have probably recently moved. (Seriously, everyone seems to move in the summer. It’s a thing.) If so, you’ve probably discovered that you need some new furnishings and decor. You could brave the crowds at your local labyrinthine Swedish prefab home goods store, or you could get exhausted even thinking about it and stay home looking at porn instead. Or you could do both at once.

The just another IKEA catalog tumblr marries internet porn with internet shopping, thereby guaranteeing that you never again have to leave your air conditioning. The blog is a collection of GIFs from amateur porn in which IKEA products feature prominently, captioned with the product name and price. Links below each GIF will send you either to the original video or to the product page on IKEA’s website, because nothing sells sheets like a money shot.

Time to start – ahem - shopping. (NSFW)

Aug 21 2013

Kristen Schaal, Eric Andre & More Performance Anxiety – August 27th

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by thepleasurechest

performance anxiety flyerAugust 27th

Join us on Tuesday, August 27th at 8pm for another evening of Performance Anxiety, the twice-monthly comedy night hosted by Eli Olsberg at our West Hollywood store.

For just $7, you get free beer, 15% off your purchases and an evening with some of the best comics working today.

The show will feature appearances by

The show is first come, first served and you are encouraged to buy tickets in advance to guarantee a seat.


Please enjoy Kristen Schaal on finding your porn name.

Aug 14 2013

The Worst of All Possible Sex Tips

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by thepleasurechest

whipped cream and other delights

We’ve been cracking up over The Hairpin’s alphabet of terrible sex tips. Among our favorites:

I Spy: If your man gets turned on by the thought of being watched, casually leave the laptop open while you’re getting it on. Then, Skype his mom!

Just Desserts: Show up at his place in a business-like trench coat, with nothing on underneath but a thick layer of whipped cream. Hope it’s not a long drive!

X-Rated Film Festival: Invite him over for a night of X-rated cinema, specifically, Evil Dead II, La Grand Bouffe, Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom, Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer, and A Clockwork Orange.

You can read the whole list here, or share your own below.

Aug 12 2013

Robots Are the Future of Dating

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by thepleasurechest

foot sniffing dog

Today, Nerve posted a list of wacky new technological gadgets that can double as dating aides. These include the dog robot, pictured above, which checks your feet for unseemly odor before you head out the door. We’re probably the most excited about the enormous robot servant that uses motion-tracking sensors to accurately refill your cup as you reach for it. It’s perfect for when you want to take your sweetheart on a date to a sci-fi utopia, before the inevitable robot uprising. Cheers!

Aug 08 2013

Holy Wedding Season, Batman!

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by thepleasurechest

batman wedding photo

 

When we first got excited about marriage equality, we hadn’t even considered the possibilities for themed weddings. This wedding photo – yes, it is a wedding photo – got us thinking. An adorable interview with one of the two grooms pictured above (the one dressed as Mr. Freeze) describes their Batman-inspired wedding, and the “good bit of fisticuffs” you’re seeing:

Since my wedding party (11 people) dressed in villain-inspired cocktail attire, and his wedding party (another 11 people) dressed in hero-inspired cocktail attire, it seemed only fitting that instead of formal line-up photos, we would go with an all-out faux brawl between the two sides.

We’re hoping that the move toward marriage equality will mean (among other, more important things) that we see more wildly creative weddings like this one.

How about you? Any offbeat pairings you’re hoping to see walk down the aisle?