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Mar 09 2012

5 Steps to Finding
& Enjoying Your G-Spot

2

by thepleasurechest

The G-Spot, also known as the urethral sponge, is the area inside a woman’s vagina that fills with fluid when aroused. It is analogous to the prostate in men, and is sometimes referred to as “the female prostate.” Many women have discovered that when applying direct pressure to the G-Spot, they can experience strong sensations, powerful orgasms, and (often) ejaculation!

The G-Spot can be a fantastic way to expand your orgasm and offer new sensations. However, please know that G-Spot stimulation is not always an orgasmic button. Some women find G-Spot stimulation uncomfortable, so be patient when exploring.

1. Find the G-Spot

It is ideal to be in a relaxed position, preferably on your back, or resting on pillows. To locate the G-Spot, insert a lubricated finger or fingers 2-3 inches into the vagina and press upward gently towards the belly button. When you find the area, it should feel spongy or textured. You can also use a firm, curved toy, like the Slimline G or the Pure Wand to assist in finding your G-Spot.

2. Stimulate the G-Spot

The G-Spot can feel sensitive or even painful if you are not aroused prior to stimulating it. For this reason, you may want to warm up with your favorite foreplay before G-Spotting.

When you’re ready, use a finger or fingers to stimulate the G-Spot with a “come hither” or beckoning motion. Bodies will respond differently to different types of stimulation, so experiment with pressure, rubbing, tapping, and vibration of the G-Spot to find what feels best. The G-Spot may respond by becoming hard. This is the result of fluid filling the area.

You can enhance the experience by taking your other hand and pressing down on the area between the navel and the pubic mound.If you are stimulating a partner’s G-Spot, you may also want to incorporate manual or oral stimulation of the clitoris.

3. Learn to Squirt

Many women who enjoy G-Spot play have also experienced ejaculation or “squirting.” Some women will only ejaculate a small amount while others might gush. This is not pee! Before play, lay down a towel or a waterproof blanket like The Fascinator.

In order to squirt, it’s important to be very relaxed. Empty your bladder prior to exploring. Fear of losing control and fear of incontinence could inhibit your ability to ejaculate. If you are trying to make a partner ejaculate, it is important to ease her fears about this. It is also a good idea not to place too much emphasis on making her ejaculate, so that she can enjoy the sensations without feeling pressure to perform.

A “need to pee” sensation is common and often the precursor to female ejaculation. If you feel yourself coming close to orgasm, bear down and pull the toy/penis/fingers out of the vaginal canal, as a full vagina can hinder ejaculation.

Through consistent stimulation of the G-Spot, many women are able to experience squirting, but it is not necessary to squirt to enjoy G-Spot play!

4. Try New Positions

Positioning is crucial for G-Spotting during partner penetration. Remember to angle fingers, toys, or penises upward, toward the belly button. For most women, the missionary position is not ideal for hitting the G-Spot. Many positions may work, but it’s important to remember that the G-Spot is only a few inches from the entrance to the vagina, so you must adapt your movements to ensure stimulation. Here are some positions especially recommended for G-Spotting with a partner.

  • Doggie style- This is the best position as it allows just the right angle for a penis or dildo to meet the G-Spot. Try slow and shallow thrusts. You can alternate these with deep penetration. The receiver can also finger her clitoris for added enjoyment.
  • Reverse cowgirl- In this position, the receiver sits astride her partner’s penis or dildo, facing away from them. Use a gentle rocking motion to stimulate the G-Spot.
  • Spooning- This is a great position as it allows the receiver to be totally relaxed and provides the ideal angle for G-Spotting.

For help with positioning you might also want to try using extra pillows or a Liberator Wedge.

5. Use Toys

There are many toys which can assist you in your G-Spotting.

Dildos with a gentle, upward curve can be a great aid in solo or partner G-Spot exploration. If you’re looking to strap it on, the Tantus Adam offers the right shape with a wide base for fitting in a harness.

The Njoy Pure Wand is widely considered to be one of the best tools for locating and pleasuring the G-Spot. Its stainless steel material is smooth and substantial, giving the necessary pressure for stimulation.

For women who would like to explore vibration, there are many vibrators designed for G-Spot play. One of the best and most affordable is the contoured Slimline G. On the higher end, the Je Joue G-kii is a luxury G-Spot vibrator, made of body-safe silicone. As every woman’s body is different, it’s also customizable, with two pivot points that you can adjust and lock, when you’ve found the right fit.

If you want to read more about G-Spot exploration, The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-Spot by sexpert Violet Blue. Or if you’re a visual learner, check out the DVD Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide to the G-Spot.

 

 

Sep 24 2011

40 Ways to Make Life Sexier

0

by thepleasurechest

We asked our LA store staff for their favorite sex tips. Here’s what they said…

Hard to remember to do your Kegel exercises? Do them at traffic lights! Every time you stop at a red light, squeeze for as long as you can, or until the light turns green, whichever comes first. -Sandra

Wrestle! The physical contact will make you sweaty, get your heart rate up and make you laugh. -Alicia

Buy a great lube, even if you think you don’t “need” one. Sometimes getting extra slippery can be just what the night needs. -Alicia

Take over one of your partner’s chores for a day. Let them relax and expect nothing in return (though you’ll probably get something!). -Alicia

Attend free sex workshops together. Get inspired! -Alicia

Find a great porn that really does it for you. -Alicia

Go down on someone without expecting anything in return. It’s sexy, fun and a good deed! -Alicia

Come up with a catchphrase to let your partner know you’re thinking of him or her naked. (Example: “Elephants are my favorite animal!”) With your partner’s consent, use the phrase often and in very public settings.  -Alicia

Roleplay! Make up a totally different persona and have your partner do the same. Don’t tell each other the details ahead of time. Meet at a predetermined location, commit to your newly acquired identities and let the sparks fly! -Oriana 

For women, the foreplay begins at dinner, not necessarily in the bedroom. Master the art of mental seduction by being attentive, making eye contact and engaging her in stimulating conversation. After all, nothing is sexier than a confident man or woman with brains to boot. -Oriana

The key to a sexy time is communication. Honestly discuss your dos and don’ts and learn to respect each other’s boundaries. It will make for a much more enjoyable time for all involved. -Oriana

Have an edible night! Edible body paint, chocolate-covered strawberries and whipped cream all have sexy possibilities. -Oriana

Whether you’ve been naughty or nice, a little spanking in the bedroom is always appropriate! Experiment with different positions rhythms. Use your hands or grab a wooden spoon from the kitchen. Just make sure to replace it afterwards! -Oriana

If your partner is female-bodied, don’t use oil-based lube, not even for anal play, as it can lead to a bacterial infection. Opt for a silicone, water-based or hybrid lube instead! -Madison

Buy great underwear. It can literally change your day. -Alicia

Compliment others. Putting all the positive energy into the world is bound to pay off somehow. Making others smile usually elicits the same response in ourselves.  -Alicia

Have a nooner. Sex in broad daylight just seems naughtier. -Alicia

Never underestimate the power of sexting. Fire up your imagination early in the day. By the time the evening comes, you won’t be able to control yourselves. -Alicia

Putting a cheeky finger in a willing butt is always fun. But be kind and lube that bad boy up before getting the party started! Spit is a sexy option, but may dry too quickly. -Madison

Set the scene! Light some candles, put together a sexy playlist, get your sexy ensemble on and make sure all your toys are at hand. -Madison

Ladies, own at least one set of sexy lingerie. Pull it out and surprise your partner(s)! Don’t have any? Bring your partner to The Pleasure Chest and pick something sexy out. -Madison

Prostitution roleplay! Have your partner meet you at a seedy motel. Dress up sexy and make them pay for it. Return home and ask them how their day went. Act like it never happened. -Kitty

Layer your sensations! Use a clit toy, nipple clamps and a toy in your ass, all at the same time, and take your orgasm to the next level. -Jamila

Do a sexy photoshoot alone or with your partner(s). Make it as tasteful or as raunchy as you want. -Alicia

Have naked movie dates. Watch a regular movie while completely nude. Try not to fool around during the entire movie. Even if you lose, you win! -Alicia

Put a little ice in your mouth before performing oral sex. The cold might be a welcome surprise to your lover. -Jess

Use bondage tape to make an outfit. Then have your lover cut it off. -Mary

Try gender play. A packer will put you in touch with your masculinity and make you feel sexy. Or, if you’ve always imagined yourself with breasts, try a pair of breast forms. Wear both at the same time and be a pomosexual gender warrior. -Matt

Gag reflex problem? Instead of numbing your throat with a spray, try swallowing! The act of swallowing should override your gag reflex. -Jess

Want to sweeten your come? Drink pineapple juice regularly! -Jess

Play the “Who can make the other come first?” game! Try your very best to make your partner climax before they make you come. The object of the game is to hold back for as long as you can, delaying that sweet, sweet release. -Shay

When you’re giving a blowjob, use thicker gel lubricant like Good Head. This will coat your mouth much better than a traditional water-based lube, so you can really get your face fucked! -Mykey

Try some sensory deprivation. Intensify your partner’s experience, or your own, by adding a blindfold and earplugs (or earbuds playing some mood-setting music). Taking away the ability to see and hear will not only heighten your sense of touch, but also add the thrill of “what’s coming next?” Have fun with it. Massage, sensation play, toys. The possibilities are endless! -Shay

Apply Nipple Nibblers to your asshole for a cool, tingly sensation. It will also make your asshole sweet and leave your lover’s tongue tingling. -Mykey

Invest in one really good toy, like a stainless steel Njoy plug or a Jimmyjane Form 2. -Lillian

Keep your partner’s package locked until you’re ready to play with a chastity device like the CB6000 or the Birdlocked. -Matt

This one’s perfect for an anniversary or birthday surprise. Buy a wireless vibrator with remote control. Wear the vibrator and then gift wrap the controller. When your partner unwraps it and asks what it does, tell them to switch it on and see your reaction. Or, if you want to be in charge, gift wrap the vibrator. When they open it, switch on the controls, so that it vibrates in their hand. Either way, you’re both in for a fun night. -Sandra

 Make a replica of your partner’s penis. You can use it when you’re apart and missing him. Or, tie him up and tease him, while he watches you get yourself off with his clone. For more fun, bend him over, lube him up and fuck him with his own cock. -Matt

Take a bath together. It’s a wonderful way to relax, and also great foreplay. Bring a waterproof toy to play with. Wash each other’s bits before the main event. – Matt

Write erotica starring yourself! - Lillian

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Aug 04 2011

Mutual Masturbation

0

by thepleasurechest

“I was the best I ever had.”—Woody Allen

We all start out masturbating. Before we discover the joys of sex and intimacy with a partner, we learn how our own bodies can give us pleasure. Studies estimate that about 90% of men and 70% of women masturbate from time to time. (As the joke goes, the remaining percent are lying!)

But how often do we share this experience with our partners? Masturbation doesn’t have to be a solo affair. In fact, when done with a partner, it can be among the hottest activities.

With mutual masturbation, you can:

  • Learn what your lover likes
  • Show your partner how to handle your business
  • Easily achieve simultaneous orgasm
  • Enjoy being an exhibitionist and/or a voyeur
  • Get off without the risk of pregnancy or STIs

So many combinations.

Mutual masturbation can be done in so many combinations. Partners can jerk off simultaneously or take turns doing each other. One partner can do all the work, while the other enjoys the ride. You can put on a show for your lover, or sit back and enjoy the view. In group situations, there are even more combinations, whether you’re a voyeur, an exhibitionist, or both.

Head to Head Stroker

Accessorize your stroke sessions.

Mutual masturbation is one of the best times to break out the toys. Dudes, here’s your chance to try out a masturbation sleeve, while your partner sucks on your nipples or fingers your ass. The Fleshlight is one of the most popular masturbation sleeves. Have your partner stroke your cock with it, for a completely different experience. Men can enjoy mutual masturbation with this Head to Head Stroker which is open on both ends.

Women, have your partner use a vibrator or G-spot toy on you, while your rub your clitoris. The Slimline G is a great vibrator for hitting the right spot, while leaving room for you to use your hands on yourself.

Want to try out the sensations of the different cooling and warming lubes? Masturbation play is the perfect time to experiment.

It’s educational.

You can learn a lot from watching your lover handle their business—everything from the speed of their strokes to the kinds of circles they make around their clit. One of the best things about mutual masturbation is the opportunity to get a hands-on lesson in how to get your lover off. Verbal feedback combined with a hands-on demo will intensify your sexual bond and enhance communication. This is your lover’s body, and it’s a great way to get acquainted.

It’s kinky.

Tease your partner by making them watch you masturbate. Don’t let them touch you or themselves. Or, tie up your partner and tease them, taking care not to let them come to soon. This can make great foreplay or the main course in a kinky evening of teasing and denial.

Black Latex Gloves

It’s safe.

Since there’s no fluid exchange and no risk of pregnancy, mutual masturbation is one of the safest ways to get off in the presence of a partner. If you’re giving your partner a helping hand, you can play even safer by wearing gloves. Combined with lube, these barrier methods can feel nearly as good as bare skin.

When to try mutual masturbation

  • While watching or looking at porn.
  • While telling or reading dirty stories.
  • When one partner is more aroused/more “in the mood” than the other.
  • When you’re not ready to “go all the away.”
  • When you absolutely need to get off!

Jul 11 2011

Cunnilingus 101:
Our Guide to Going Down

0

by thepleasurechest

We know they don’t teach cunnilingus in school, but that’s no excuse! If you want to be a good lover, you need to grow up and go down! Learning to give head can be intimidating, but there’s no need to get tongue-tied. Here are some suggestions for getting started.

Ladybits: Your Road Map

The first step to learning oral sex is to know the lay of the land. If you’re a man, it’s important to remember that all of the parts on a woman are analogous to your own. If you know what feels good on your body, you’ll have a good idea of what she’s feeling.

Outer Labia- The outer lips of the vagina. On boys, these are the counterpart to the skin on the scrotum. For this reason, you want to be careful about applying too much suction, unless your partner likes it. Kissing, licking and small nibbles are all good.

Inner Labia- The inner lips are the counterpart to the shaft of the penis, and have greater sensitivity than the outer lips.

Clitoris- The clitoris has more nerve endings than any part of the body, and those nerve endings run up into the vagina. It’s analogous to the glans (the cockhead) on a man. For this reason, it’s the most sensitive to direct stimulation. Not simply a tiny penis, the clitoris is actually wishbone-shaped. It has “legs” on both sides. The clitoris is so powerful that we like to think of it as a mafia boss. You can’t go straight to the boss. You gotta start small and establish some cred before making an introduction.

Clitoral Hood- The hood protects the clitoris. It’s the counterpart to the foreskin on the penis. Some women prefer focus on their hood, as the clit can be too sensitive.

Urethra- This is analogous to the meatus (or pisshole) on a penis. Most women don’t want you to mess with this when you’re going down, but some may like it and others may even enjoy urethral sounding!

G-Spot- Like a man’s prostate, the G-Spot loves to be stimulated. G-Spot stimulation can be combined with oral sex, for explosive orgasms.

Tips, Tricks ‘n Licks

Warm her up.

Sometimes, great foreplay requires a little foreplay of its own. We know you want to dive in and start licking, but in most cases, that’s not going to work. Start instead by stroking and kissing her whole body. For shorter sessions, start at her bellybutton and kiss down to her inner thighs, letting her feel your warm breath on her vulva. You might also want to try mutal masturbation or female genital massage. Wherever the mood takes you, have fun, and wait until she’s visibly aroused before moving on to the main event.

First kisses.

When she’s ready, you can move in for your first kiss. Start with gentle, wet kisses on her labia. Don’t focus on one spot, instead getting everything warm and wet. Don’t go for her clit unless she asks. You can use your lips to “nibble” her lips. You should be able to tell from her response if she’s ready to move to the next step. If she’s not getting wet, you may also want to use some lube to help her along.

Start Licking!

At this point, you can start licking. You can also start to focus your energies on the clitoris. Start by licking and kissing around the clit first, and if she responds with encouragement, you can move ahead to more direct stimulation. Remember that there is no “correct” way to use your tongue, but generally it’s best to use broad strokes on the sensitive bits, and use the tip of your tongue elsewhere.

Variety.

Once she’s started to enjoy your mouth, you can try varying your strokes and kisses and licks. Try making circles around her clitoris with your tongue. You may want to try licking along the “legs” of the clitoris, and work your way to the center. These correspond to the shaft on a man’s penis.

Wrap your lips around her clit and create suction. With her clit in your mouth, you can use your tongue like a finger to deliver firm strokes.

Some women will also enjoy being penetrated with your tongue. If she quivers, that’s a sign that she’s too sensitive, and you need to back off. If she pulls you in, or moves her body closer to your mouth, that’s a good sign she wants more. If she adjusts her hips, she might just be finding the best position for her, and doesn’t want you to follow. When in doubt, ask! As she builds closer to orgasm, you’ll want to maintain the rhythm of your licks, and maintain your focus on the spot that is getting her there.

Patience.

Don’t be too goal-oriented. Orgasm can take time. In some cases, it’s not even the goal. So focus instead on enjoying the privilege of giving her this most intimate pleasure.

Dos & Don’t’s

Do change the strength and intensity of your strokes, to vary her sensations!
Don’t change them when she’s close to coming!

Do show enthusiasm and give positive reinforcement after!
Don’t get so lost in your own enjoyment that you miss her cues.

Do use your hands and whole face when pleasuring her.
Don’t come to bed with jagged fingernails or beard stubble.

Do keep licking as she’s coming.
Don’t stop until she pushes you away or signals that she’s had enough.

Do use the heat of your breath to excite her.
Don’t blow into her vagina.

Positions

When you’re comfortable with using your tongue, experiment with finding the right position for an oral sex session. Here are some of the most common:

On your knees. Have your partner sit in a chair or edge of the bed and kneel on the floor before her. Use a pillow so your knees don’t get sore. This is a comfortable position for her, and it gives you the most freedom to use your hands.

On her back. Lie on your belly or kneeling on the bed, and let your partner lie on her back, either with her legs spread or wrapped around your back. This is a very comfortable position for your partner and gives you access to everything. You might want to try using a Liberator wedge to you access while making her comfortable.

Facesitting. Let your partner “sit” or kneel over your face. This is a great position for when your partner likes to be fucked with your tongue. Use a pillow to support your neck. If your partner is facing forward, she can hang on to the headboard for support. This position will also allow you to make eye contact. With your partner facing the other way, she can stimulate you manually, engage in 69 or simply drape her body over yours. Hot!

Doggie style. Have your partner kneel facing away from you and lick her from behind. Doggie style gives you great access, especially for anal play or vaginal penetration.

Sideways. Your partner can lie on her side, allowing you to rest your head on her thigh. This is a great position for pregnant women.

Fingers & Toys, Oh My!

Most women enjoy manual stimulation or penetration while receiving oral sex. Your fingers are your best tools. Start by holding onto her waist or squeezing her ass. When your partner is wet, you can bring your hands into play. Slowly insert one or two fingers into her vagina, while keeping your mouth busy. Some women just like to feel something inside of them during oral sex, while others will respond to thrusting. With practice, you’ll be able to learn to read the signs, but in the meantime, ask questions! Faster or slower? Softer or harder? Another finger or none at all?

You may also want to incorporate toys into your oral play. A small vibrator or dildo can help push your partner over the top from pleasure to ecstasy. It’s probably best not to pick a toy that’s too big. The goal here is to enhance the sensations you’re already creating with your mouth. And you don’t want a ginormous dildo blocking your mouth’s access.

Since you’re already focusing on her clit, you may want to focus on her other pleasure center, with a G-Spot toy, like the Slimline G.

Safer Sex

Cunnilingus carries the risk of STI infection. For this reason, some people will only have unprotected oral sex with a fluid-bonded partner. If you want to play as safely as possible, we recommend using a barrier during oral sex. The easiest method is to use a latex sheet known as a Dental Dam. Alternately you can use a piece of Saran Wrap. If doing so, make sure you don’t use microwave-safe varieties. Whether using a dam or Saran Wrap, you’ll unfortunately miss the taste of your partner, but she’ll still be able to feel the heat from your mouth. A drop of lube can be applied on the inside of the latex or plastic to enhance sensation and help encourage your partner’s natural lubrication to begin.

she comes firstGet Schooled

It’s impossible to cover oral sex in just a few hundred words. In fact, entire books have been devoted to the subject. To become a truly cunning linguist, consider doing some advanced study.

Violet Blue’s The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus is an excellent practical manual for overcoming insecurities, developing your technique and playing safely. We also love She Comes First, which is beautifully written as well as hugely practical.

Finally, we can’t say this enough: The best way to get better at going down is through practice. Your partner is your best teacher! No two women are alike, and what may have worked for one woman may not get another off. The more you explore cunnilingus with your partner, and the more you use your mouth to communicate outside of the bedroom, the better you’ll get.