THIS ENTRY WAS POSTED ON March 6, 2017 BY THEPLEASURECHEST.
When engaging in anal play, it is essential to relax and use plenty of lube. Unlike the vagina, the anus is not self-lubricating. One of the key things to remember about anal adventures with a partner is the incredible amount of trust involved. Practice open communication with your partner and let the person being penetrated control the action. Ultimately, good anal sex boils down to 5 principles: Communication, Preparation, Relaxation, Lubrication, Exploration.
Communication:
Porn and pop culture tells us that anal sex is painful and something to soldier through, but it doesn't have to be that way! This fear causes folks to turn to numbing lubes or creams, which are unsafe because they inhibit the body’s pain response. Pain is your body's way of telling you that something is wrong, and you should listen to it! Always remember that consent is key, and that anything less than an enthusiastic YES! is a NO.
Preparation:
Anal sex doesn’t really “just happen”, and definitely not like it does in porn. Many of us like to take some steps to prepare for anal sex before we jump in to it. This prep can include (but is not limited to) eating right and staying hydrated before the big event (maybe don't have Taco Bell before a hot anal sex date!). A shower beforehand is always encouraged, and if you want to take things a step further, you can always douche with warm waterabout an hour or two before sex. You can also keep things clean AND safe with Condoms, gloves, and dams.
Relaxation:
It's a fact: we carry lots of stress and tension in our butts! In order to relax enough for insertion, you need to take the time to warm up the butt. Give your partner a butt-focused massage with the Kama Sutra Massage Candle, which smells great and melts into warm (not hot!) massage oil. Use your fingers to start opening up your partner, or rim them. You can also build up to anal sex by wearing/playing with a butt plug. We love the Fun Factory Bootie, which is a great option for anal amateurs and is now available in a graduated set. Only use toys with a handle or flared base, like the Casanova, otherwise they can slip inside the rectum during use and get lost. Trust me, you don't want to be stuck in the E.R. concocting a story about how you slipped and fell ass-first onto a spatula!
 |  |  |
Lubrication:
We cannot stress this enough: use a lot of lube! If you think you have enough, you're probably wrong. Silicone lube like Pjur Analyse Me! is great for butt sex because it stays slick for a long time, but water-based lube can be thicker and more cushioning for delicate anal tissue, like Sliquid Sassy. And there's always the ever-popular oil-based lube like Boy Butter, but be advised that is NOT compatible with latex condoms. Experiment to find what’s right for you. And be sure to read about Our Favorite Anal Lubes.
Exploration:
Remember to relax and take things slow. By now you should have spent plenty of time warming up the butt and easing your partner open. Don’t be goal driven, be experience driven. Even if eventually you’re getting ready to learn how to enjoy pounding penetration, take it one step at a time, and remember to feel all of the new sensations throughout your body. Let yourself luxuriate in the feeling. The slower you go, the more you’ll be able to feel and enjoy. When you finally start penetration (with a toy or with a penis) go slowly and continually check in with your partner. Let them call the shots: it's their butt, after all! During butt play, do not enter the vagina with the same toy/finger/penis without thoroughly washing it or changing condoms.