THIS ENTRY WAS POSTED ON August 11, 2015 BY Chris Cherrie.
Scared to suck a dick? Frightened to flog? Like walking into a gym for the first time, it might be embarrassing to ask, “How the F do I use this thing?” Luckily, there’s an abundance of sexual swag, techniques, and fetishes that can be super liberating to check out. Of course it may take a minute to get jazzy with licking a butt, strapping-on, or getting tied up, and it can be embarrassing to learn in front of someone you’re trying to shag.
When tasting a new flavor, having a sex buddy who's more experienced can be an awesome way to learn. If you’re both new, you can learn together! You’re good as long as you have someone compassionate who won't spank you when you spit out a gross flavor (unless you’re into that). If finding the perfect mate is a task - have sex with yo’self! Learn what feels right, talk dirty out loud alone, and discover parts of your body that you didn’t even know existed!
If you happen to be the mentor in this sexy situation, here are a few
things to consider. Communication in the moment is key, so ask
questions: “do you need more lube?”, or “what feels better X or Y?”, or
“would you like fries with that?” Your session should stop when either
one of you stops enjoying it. Let your newbie dictate the pace and err
on the side of patience. When trying something new it’s important to
stay turned-on; jack off, use a vibe or put on some good ol’ porno.
Socially constructed values, cultural shame, and undereducated misconceptions, can create barriers for some of us. Things like “If I take it up the butt I’m gay”, “Going down on him lowers my self worth”, or “I shouldn’t need to use a vibrator to orgasm” are beliefs that cut us off from experiencing some of the most simple and satisfying pleasures that life has to offer. So next time you’re thinking of ordering a scoop of Brown Butter Candied Bacon, Fruity Pebbles & Coconut Milk, or simply Vanilla with a cherry on top, start with a sample spoon and then stuff your face.
Bon Appétit!
Chris Cherrie is a Canadian Designer and creator of FRATERNIZE, a tool for #GuysWhoLikeGuys to explore, educate and expand manhood. Check out their Mostly Everything You Need To Know Toolkit for Guys Who Like Guys at goFraternize.org. #GayEdu #GaySlangDic