THIS ENTRY WAS POSTED ON March 29, 2023 BY Jesse Fabert.
Transmasculine people, like anyone else, come in a range of shapes, sizes, identities, and preferences. Finding sex toys that will fit well with your body as well as affirming your gender identity can feel like a tall order-- but the right toy(s) can unlock new ways of inhabiting gender expression. So let's talk about why transmasc trans men need our own toys, what considerations come up when looking for a toy, and maybe offer up some new ideas to try.
Why do trans guys need their own toys?
The biggest reason is anatomy. Not every trans man has their own penis. Many transmasculine people undergo hormone replacement therapy, which over time can change the shape of one’s downstairs situation. With enough time and testosterone, the external portion of the clitoris becomes larger (and may be more noticeably erect during arousal!) and the internal anatomy may not self-lubricate as well as it used to, and may not accommodate dildos as such. Toys that used to be great fun may no longer fit quite right and it can feel sometimes like every toy is designed for “innies,” when you’ve got an “outie.”
It’s not just hormones, though–some trans masculine people opt for a hysterectomy, which can also limit self-lubrication or make longer internal toys uncomfortable to use. Someone who’s had phalloplasty might fit perfectly into toys designed for cisgender men, but a guy who’s had metoidioplasty might have trouble finding strokers or condoms that fit his size. But toymakers are increasingly designing toys with the trans guy in mind, and plenty of existing toys have become popular among transmascs almost by accident.
The other reason is mentality. Many companies that make sex toys tend to market them in highly-gendered ways. Frequently, these toymakers are trying to cut through the stigma that masturbation and sex toys are sleazy, dirty, and unladylike. As much as I love their work, it can be difficult to build a sense of one’s own transmasculine eroticism when it feels like every toy that hits the right spot is threatening to “unleash your inner goddess.”
While it may seem that most sex toy brands assume if you have a penis and want penetration, you have to choose anal targeted stimulation, this isn't true! You don't have to immediately jump to anal play! We live in a world where sexual expression deviates from missionary position, there are products that a transgender man can use and enjoy while feeling like the true expression of transmasculinity, whatever that means for you.
The mind is a powerful player in your sex life, and considering it so opens up whole new possibilities for erotic exploration–even feeling physical pleasure from a prosthetic penis! In cases like this, a more realistic phallus that matches your skin tone is more likely to do the trick–unless you prefer a dick that’s a little more fantastical, like the science-fiction-inspired creations at Pris Toys. You could build yourself a whole collection of dicks, suited to a variety of different partners or styles of play.
Whether you’re playing alone or with others, sex can offer a wealth of opportunities to inhabit and express your particular trans masculinity, to feel present in your body, and to feel desirable doing it. Here is a list of toys and sexy sundries that can help.
FTM Sex Toys: Marvelous Masturbators
 Je Joue Fifi |  FemmeFunn Volea |  Satisfyer Pro 2 Gen 2 |
If you’re a fan of “rabbit” vibrators, Je Joue’s Fifi has not one but two external arms, each with their own vibrating motor. Both Fifi and FemmeFunn’s Volea are shaped so that they vibrate around the clitoris, spreading vibration to its internal arms. If you enjoy vibration but find that other bullets and rabbits tend to “drift” to one side or the other of your t-dick, these are for you.
The Satisfyer Pro 2 Gen 2 is my all-around favorite suction toy to recommend, and it’s especially well-suited for transmasculine anatomy. The soft silicone mouth is deeper than most toys of its kind (Satisfyer even offers additional sizes, bought separately). The Pro 2 offers a combination of suction and vibration via two separate motors, which gives you a lot of control for dialing in on the exact settings that make your toes curl.
FTM Toys for Pumping & Stroking
 Tenga Egg Hardboiled Edition |  NYTC Jack 2-in-1 Packer |  NYTC Transmasc Pump |
Tenga’s Hard-Boiled Eggs are super-squishy little strokers that come with a single-serving packet of lube. At just $7.95 a pop, they’re a great chance to try out strokers with a variety of internal textures without breaking the bank. If you prefer something that’s firmer and enables more of a stroking gesture during use, New York Toy Collective’s Jack is a popular standby for millennial transmascs. It also works as a packer, which makes it a great toy to take with you on any date that you hope might get a little handsy.
Both of these toys (as well as the Pro 2 above) pair well with NYTC’s Transmasc Pump, a hand-powered, small-scale pump made with testosterone-takers in mind. Pumping can increase bloodflow, sensation, and even size, if only temporarily–perfect for getting yourself ready to fill out a stroker, receive a blowjob, or take some sexy selfies.
Going for the money shot with your Sex Toy?
 Bust It Squirting Realistic Cock |  POP n' Play Squirting Dildo |  Spunk Hybrid Lube |
Remember what I said earlier about mindset? For your consideration, I offer the squirting dildo–nearly indistinguishable from any other dil, but with the added feature of being able to squirt any lube of your choosing on command (or even something not-lube, if you’re feeling creative!). If you’ve never experienced the joy of topping with a toy that allows for ejaculation, I’d highly recommend giving it a shot. Squirting dildos are also excellent for applying lube in deep places whenever you need it–no need to hit the brakes to fuss with a slippery bottle.
For an especially realistic experience, you can fill these toys with any cumlube. Bust It! comes with a small bottle of Doc Johnson’s own cumlube, Nut Butter; alternatively, Spunk Hybrid Lube is famous for its realistic color and texture. However, both of these lubricants contain silicone, which means they could shorten the lifespan of any silicone toy, make it porous and harder-to-clean, or void its warranty (if it has one). Use them carefully, clean toys thoroughly both before and after use, and don’t swallow!
Sex Toys for Transmasc Folks: Tools for Topping
 b.cush Honeybunch Silicone Base |  Ohnut Buffer Rings |  Shagger Silicone Base |
At last, the bits and bobs that fit no other category! The b.cush, Honeybunch, and Shagger are all intended to fit on the back of any wide-base silicone dildo, to give you a little more texture to grind against while topping with a harness. The Honeybunch can even accommodate a bullet vibe for extra sensation, and any of them can easily be used as a solo grinding toy all on their own.
Last but not least, Ohnut is a set of super-stretchy, interlocking buffer rings that can be placed around the base of any penetrative sex toy (or a partner’s penis) in order to limit the depth of penetration. This is a fantastic utility for folks who have had a hysterectomy, or anyone who prefers shallower penetration.
A Final Word of Encouragement
At its best, sex–with others or with yourself–can bring so much joy, creativity, and connection. Remember, transmasc people aren't limited to anal sex or anal toys to enjoy penetrative sex, which is great! So don't be afraid to try out new things, and don't be discouraged if it takes a few tries to find the right tools and terms to suit your style.
Jesse Fabert is a visual artist and sex educator in Chicago. His work focuses on masculine eroticism and emotionality. Sometimes, he writes about gender. You can find his art on Instagram or Behance.